"An expedition that sets out to climb Mount Everest and doesn't reach the top is called a failure. But an expedition that sets out to find whatever it will find cannot fail. Let that be your expedition, to discover what is in the here and "NOW" rather than looking for something that matches your imagination, rather than looking
for anything, look at everything. See what is set
right in front of you, what is real.
Looking to match things to our preconception of what they'll (child predators) do doesn't work as well as seeing what is. In fact, looking for child predators - as opposed to perceiving behaviors that might precede an attack - is actually counterproductive. That's because you might have in mind an imagined appearance - and anything imagined takes you out of what's actually occurring in front of you..."
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Take the power away from predators by passing on:
The Eight Red Flags For Identifying Child Predators™
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To summarize de Becker, Taylor and Marquart, looking for child predators would be like seeking wealth by applying the belief that every place you go contains diamonds. For a time, your mind might look for diamonds, and then after finding none, it would stop. Rather than looking for diamonds - which are rare - a more constructive adage for attaining wealth would be "Look for opportunities" because opportunities are not rare.
Similarly, if one looks for child predators, and day after day they aren't found, the search has no payoff. A better approach encourages us to look for nothing and instead to directly perceive what's actually here.
So rather than giving your mind an assignment it will quickly tire of, i.e.,"Look for Child Predators", here's an assignment that actually has a frequent payoff: See and register behavior relevant to a predator attacking children. In other words, watch all behavior and gauge it against what you know is a sign of danger (The Eight Red Flags) regardless of what it is, where it occurs or how you are feeling at the moment.
Ideally, each event will gain your attention for only the length of time it takes to either qualify it for continuing interest or be discounted... For instance, you might see a person with an overly friendly smile, and you note they are a bit too charming. A person goes out of their way to help with students in extra curricular activities, you ask yourself, "What's the benefit for him?" You see an interaction between an adult and a student and you note the child's body language and facial expression show discomfort. All of these behaviors are worthy of holding your attention - until they aren't.
"If you do observe a child predator, then you become the predator. Then you draw on your powerful resources. But no predator in Nature wastes those precious resources before they are needed. No predator remains in a constant state of predation, nor does any predator always hunt for prey; the most effective predators are always ready to exploit any opportunity that arises.
'How can you tell when you're in the "NOW"? By the constant recognition of new information...But if you allow it, your mind will pounce on (what it already knows)... because your mind loves things that are predicable, loves confirming what it already knows. Following along and hearing that which is already known is a test the mind always passes, and the mind loves tests - and particularly loves passing tests, winning points, being right. But to stay in the "NOW", you don't listen (to that which you already know).
'Your five senses will register what is already known but you don't give away your greatest asset: your attention. You can be sure that a person who is about to attack is not focused on (the ordinary details) but he is counting that you are."- Just 2 Seconds, Using Time and Space To Defer Assassins, by Gavin de Becker, Tom Taylor and Jeff Marquartt
Your challenge as a predator of predators, is to stay alert, seeing what is before you, rather than what you think you already know. For example, you see a man inviting children to sit on his lap. It makes you uncomfortable. You check the behavior against The Eight Red Flags. This is being in the "NOW". Being out of the "NOW" is telling yourself, "Well, he's Joey's grandpa," and allowing your mind to override a behavior that awakens concern.
Approximately one-third of our population has been harmed by child predators as a result of “social blindness”. Most of these events occurred because adults were not in the "NOW". Translated this means that the entire population of three states, Texas, California and Ohio (One-third the population of the US) have been sexually assaulted or killed because a predator moved within our “blind spots”.
For social change, for social health, we must remove the blind spots. We must learn to be in the "NOW" and to pay attention to "behavior” and we must pass this skill on to our children. Who is more at risk than our children? Moving into a new school year, may this Yello Dyno Memo empower you to successfully protect the children in your lives.
Again I have attached the gift: Yello Dyno’s Eight Red Flags for Recognizing a Child Predator™.
We hear over and over again that there is no way to recognize a predator. This is wrong!
We see their "behavior" and this makes them visible.
The Eight Red Flags™ have revealed many a predator. Learn, teach, use The Eight Red Flags™ to see and stop a child from being harmed by a predator.
Want to learn more? We’re
here to help. We offer workshops for communities, parents,
educators, law enforcement, government agencies, churches,
non-profits and children. We have a new workshop focused on The
Red Flags™, Removing the Blind Spots
and being in the present, "NOW".
Here is the link to learn more about our workshops
for adults: http://www.yellodyno.com/html/C_Red_Flags_Workshop.html
Yours for child safety,
Jan Wagner
Yello Dyno Founder
Pass The Eight Red Flags™ on now. With understanding will come social change.
Contact Us: Need more information? Call Barbara toll free 888-935-5639, extension 104,
or contact us by e-mail. We look forward to helping you select the training, curricula, materials and programs that will meet your safety needs.
P.S. Educators, Non-profits, Churches and Law Enforcement: to have a Yello Dyno Curriculum sent to you for a thirty-day review, fill out this online form, or call me at 888-935-5639 ext. 100 or email me at Jan@YelloDyno.com
Comments? Ideas for future memos? Contact me: Jan@YelloDyno.com.
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